Day 29

I played 7 Wonders many times today at Port Dickson and I honestly never got bored or  tired of it...
It was really fun as I kept building my science building and no one stopped me! I got 38 points just from science.. I was very excited! If we were still together I would've send you the photo of my wonder, you'll be so proud of me!!
Any board games that I play reminds me of you, like literally anything....

Everything about us felt so different now.. We can't even talk or say hi in a proper manner, it's really hard to get used to it..
We used to be able to talk a lot even as friends....
But now.. We can't talk or do anything.......
I really miss you......

Sam and the guy got together already, I'm very happy for her but I'm emo-ing...
If we were still together, we could've gone out together, just the 4 of us...
We coudive gone on couple trips just us...
We could've acheieved many many things... But unfortunately everything had to come to an end....

I started thinking how other couples have much more serious issues but is willing to work it out and fight for the relationship.... But for us.. We just had to stop because you didn't want it anymore...
Why is it so hard to fight for me? For us?
Back then we still had feelings for each other, we could've work on our feelings and on the relarionship... But you didn't want because you were emotionally drained and tired... You didn't have the commitment to work issues out between us... Every issue that came in between us became a reason for you to leave me because all you thought was how different you and I are both wired...
In general, girls and guys and wired differently in their thinking and perception.. It's how we compromise and overcome the differences... It requires effort and commitment....
If only we could've done more for our relationship, we might still be together now....

I'm leaving soon.. How would things be for us??
Will there be a U-turn for us in future??
If we were meant to be together and if I chose to leave, would it be like what WF said that nothing would happen within the period that I'm away? Or I would've killed all hopes?
Are we ever meant to be together??
Sigh , only God knows the answer.....

I just have a feeling that I'll always love you in a special way even after moving on..
I don't know how to explain it...
I believe that if we are meant to be together,  God will preserve our feelings in us...
And if we're not... Maybe someone better is waiting for us out there...
I'm learning to obey and honour God in everything that I do...
When I place God first, everything else including us will fall into place..
Whether we will be strangers, friends, best friends or lovers  will be in God's favor and for the glory of Him......

I'm learning how to take one step at a time and to slowly recover from the pain in me..
Every little step that I take will be a progress as long as I'm moving forward, right?